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Dear Santa,

Can i have some wishes? I hope everyone around me will be happy and healthy... no more sadness and poverty.. No more fights and quarrels..

Have i been implanted in a r/s so deep i cant pull myself out from this misery?
Wad can i do except mock at my own foolishness?
Have i not a good girl that's why i get this type of retribution?
Wad can i do except mock at my own childishness?
Have i been hurting others so bad this is all happening to me?
Wad can i do except mock at my own stubbornness?
Have i been wrong in wanting to be with that someone so bad it kills from deep inside?
Wad can i do except mock at my own selfishness?
Have i been wrong to think about this day and night for the past 1 week i cant breathe?
Wad can i do except mock at my own craziness?

So Dear Santa.. help me.. tell me.. why are there ppl in this world who make their firm stands and still get things they want? Why the decisions in my life is made by someone else but me?
Why they ASSUME i'm wasting my youth and time when i dun think im not? Why am i crying as i type? Is it silly of me? Am i a stupid fool who cant take charge of my own life? Am i a sweetheart in someone else's heart? Who can tell me Wad will become of me 5yrs down the road? I'm not greedy to ask for a lifetime though i hope i can.. All i want is for things to happen naturally.. rather than putting a fullstop to this chapter in my life..

I cant smile because it happened because its still in progress.. I cant think about any other things because all i have now is thoughts of the past and present... Future is smth that is build by me and ppl around me.. if that someone around me wishes to walk away.. wer will i end up? how will i end up? what will i end up?

Just a simple 4-letter word like L.O.V.E holds a million meanings to each and everyone of us...
Wad is love? sweet? bitter? tiring? tomenting? painful? crazy? exciting? fun? .... the list goes on...

Wad do we use to measure love?

A filled- up pail? as times go by.. it dries up?
A pair of shoes? can onie fit the right and only one person?
A bowl of rice? can fill you up and warms u from within?
A paper plane? That flies in the direction of no where?
A zoo? with many other competitors?

So many analysis of things.. i dunno how to go about it.. Is he waiting for me to say it out rather than he say it? so that the guilt will be lesser? Wad if i never say out and he keeps avoiding the topic and slowly drift away from my life?

Dear Santa... I know i should be happy that i am wad i am.. i have wad i have... if it takes 5yrs of my life for this short-lived happiness... let me die in peace then... disappear from this surface of the earth.. like a piece of trash.. noted by some ppl but didnt bother to do anything abt it..

*~ signing off ~* don't miss me too much paws.. u'll always be my best fren.. to my mum..
sorry im not the best daughter in the world... hope i've at least brought u more happiness than pain.. To my bro and sis ... thanks for being a part in my life.. and to the rest of my frens and family i wish u all health and happiness... to noob mui.. pls dun be gullible and get cheated by guys.. i hope he is ur last one.. love u all to bits... to derrick.. dun blame me for nt being patient enuf to wait for ur ans.... i'll always rmb u... and pls dun worry for me.. this is not my will... i din decide to die... i just very emo right now.. irrational perhaps? leave me...

Labels: Dear Santa

Hmm.. got to know paws when i was working as part-time in 7-11 back about 2-3yrs le bah..
Wonder how we ever became besties.. she didn't reallie liked me from the start.. haha.. and she seldom smiles.. Loves to complain and grumble about the things i've requested her to do for me..

She's like that.. But.. slowly as time goes by.. we started going out.. from a simple dinner to movies and shopping.. talked alot about future and guys.. haha.. by nature.. she's a kind.. hardworking(sometimes onie).. chatty girl.. takes time to open up i guess..

In these years that we've been tgt.. We helped each other get thru heartbreaks, family quarrels,
job-related unhappiness, shared secrets.. Really appreciate having u in my life.. if i get to be a human next life time i will still choose to be ur bestie.. Best frens forever.. love ya girl~ <3

Labels: About my bestie - pauline

2 days ago dearie came my hse to send me a the BOF soundtrack songs..
Here's my personal favourite..

Love You By HowL

I keep smelling the fragrance of promise
I guess the wind that swept by you is passing by my side right now
maybe it's a sunshine in my heart that shines on only you
It even embraces the painful scars.

Love you
bringing you up, I close my eyes tight once again
I love you, if I can fill up both your eyes
I love you, if I show you my laughterI'd take everything under the starlight and give them to you
I love you, if I can convey this heart to youI love you, if you teach that heartI'll become like it in every way
love you, love you, love you, forever.

I'm walking, following you, hiding behind the moonlight
what do I do if you don't notice
should I make another request to the clouds to rain again
so I can hold your wet heart


love you
bringing you up, I close my eyes tight once again
I love you, if I can fill up both your eyes
I love you, if I show you my laughterI'd take everything under the starlight and give them to you
I love you, if I can convey this heart to you
I love you, if you teach that heartI'll become like it in every way
love you, love you, love you, forever.


here's the link interested pls do listen till the end~ <3 u
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B05VNVAv5BE

Labels: Love U by HowL

Hmm.. today's post... wanna talk about how well do i think i noe dear.. so wanna 'guess' 10 things i 'think' he likes.. ^.^V

1) Rx-8 (type-R) preferably? hehe..
2) White Color.. (clothes and accessories)
3) Latest korean drama - BOF
4) Unagi sushi.. ^^
5) Initial D version 5
6) Dota and L4D..
7) His hair.. lolx..
8) His rice with gravy ( probably braised sauce?)
9) Dining at TAOs Restaturant .. (so do i)
10) Helping Ppl.. esp family and frens..

I hope i din get anything wrong~ o.O
If there's more u can add at my tag box.. haha..
maybe 11) can be arguing with noob mui.. lol~
I'm just kidding! ^.^V


Stay tune folks.. <3

Labels: 10 things abt him

Wow.. i just surfing around youtube and i found tis supeeeeer sexy dance by korean artiste..

click on the link provided.. enjoy..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o4NKbofRzYY&feature=fvw

Mmm.. Wads that aroma rushing out thru my kitchen area?? Oh its my dishes~!! Today took effort to cook a decent lunch for dear and my mummie~~ Got vegetables fried with mushrooms..
Got spring onion and ginger stir-fry chicken and lastly steamed red snapper.. Turns out pretty good~ WE ALL enjoyed it at least~ ^^

Dear say the fish very nice~ i personally love the chicken~ ^.^V too bad was too hungry~ Forget to take the pics! Next time i got chance i will take again! paws dun jealous~ u are one of the first to taste my cooking~ hehe.. anyways on monday i went out with ward 43 colleagues to watch transformer 2 wooh.. very packed cinema~ but the show fun~ cuz got ancestor for primes~ lol.. watch and u'll find out more~

Tues went out with qiuli and candy and tian peng for dinner~.. cafe cartel serving become smaller lol.. and the presentation was lousy.. even restaurant busy, the food presentation must be up to mark de ma~ but the spicy winglets bagus! hehe.. crissspy!
then we went home after dinner~~

today wanted to cut hair den dear said his hse got to install some network thingy.. then no go cut.. sat we go cut k? ^.^

plans for tmr.. meeting my bestie paws for dinner and ice age 3! woot!

Labels: My bagus lunch cooking

manda :)



twentythree. 31dec. cute. loving. outgoing.
princess. purple/green fanatic.
straight-forward. loved.





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